


The Tony Stark Whirlwind of Worthless Explanations

by Dawen



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Bisexual Steve Rogers, Gen, Homophobic Language, Implied homophobia, blood drive, used sarcastically to explain society's views
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-21
Updated: 2018-01-21
Packaged: 2019-03-07 21:53:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 506
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13444167
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dawen/pseuds/Dawen
Summary: Steve’s minding his own business, last week’s crossword spread out on the table in front of him and a dwindling pile of cheddar chips by his elbow. And then Tony fucking Stark comes wandering in, tablet in hand and sniggering loudly.Steve looks up in exasperation. “How did you get in?”Tony waves him off. “Never mind that,” he says breezily. “You’re gonna need to do some damage control real soon.”





	The Tony Stark Whirlwind of Worthless Explanations

**Author's Note:**

> A capkink fill, which can be found here: https://capkink.dreamwidth.org/1349.html?thread=388421#cmt388421
> 
> Also, uh... I never actually got around to researching why gay men were not allowed to give blood, just went with the explanation that made the most sense, so it could be wrong. -shrugs-

Tony’s the one who clues him in.   
  
Steve’s minding his own business, last week’s crossword spread out on the table in front of him and a dwindling pile of cheddar chips by his elbow. And then Tony fucking Stark comes wandering in, tablet in hand and sniggering loudly.   
  
Steve looks up in exasperation. “How did you get in?”   
  
Tony waves him off. “Never mind that,” he says breezily. “You’re gonna need to do some damage control real soon.”   
  
Steve sets down his pencil in resignation of The Tony Stark Whirlwind of Worthless Explanations. “Damage control with what, now? And we _will_ talk about how you got in.”   
  
“That conference yesterday? With the blood donation thing? Yeah, you’re gonna need to clarify a couple things there.” Tony throws himself down in the chair opposite Steve with careless grace that probably isn’t so careless, sniggering again.    
  
“I fail to see what part of that speech wasn’t clear, Stark.”   
  
“The part where you said you can’t donate, obviously.” The implied _duh_ hangs in the air as Tony leans forward and takes a chip from Steve’s pile. “You can’t just say you’re banned from donating and leave it at that.”   
  
Steve frowns. “I’m not,” he says. “Because of the serum.”   
  
“Yeah, but –“ Tony breaks off, laughing. “People are assuming it’s because you’ve had sex with other men!”   
  
Steve stares at Tony blankly for a minute, until the words drop into his brain and make sense. Then he scowls. Tony takes one look at his face and starts hooting. “You mean to tell me,” Steve says, voice dangerously low, “that men who have had sex with other men are not allowed to donate blood, for no reason than that they’ve had sex with other men?”   
  
Tony stops laughing abruptly. “Uh, yeah,” he starts, voice careful. “That’s not the part I thought you’d have a problem with first.”   
  
“It’s blatant discrimination! How did this become a law in the first place?”   
  
Tony blinks once, twice, then mutters, “Why was I not expecting this first?” Louder, he says, “Eh, AIDS scare, general homophobia, obviously gay people all have dirty diseases floating around in their blood…”   
  
Steve shifts his glare from the damning tablet in Tony’s hands to the crossword in front of him. “Fine,” he snarls. “That’s gonna have to change, then. Isn’t there some sort of screening they can do on the blood? They’d have to, anyway, plenty of straight people have AIDS.”   
  
Tony shrugs. “Yeah, definitely. The HIV test is a blood test. They’d just use that.”   
  
Steve nods. “Fine, then. I’ll have to make a statement, see if that can get people’s attention.”   
  
“You know,” Tony says, crunching on another chip. “This is not the sort of statement I was supposed to tell you to make.”   
  
Steve stands up in search of his phone, and shrugs. “Yeah, well,” he says, “apparently I can’t give blood for two reasons and I’ll be damned, Tony, if one of them doesn’t make any sense at all.”   
  
Tony chokes gratifyingly on his stolen chip.


End file.
